Stop Whining
I get a couple emails like this every day:
Mr. Goldberg:Given the generally desultory reviews of your latest tome by reviewers across a wide spectrum of political thought, is it not possible you simply wrote a bad book? You’d hardly be alone. Most books are bad, but few authors spend as much time fretting about how they’re being reviewed as you.Why should you care if reviewers from both the left and right are trashing your work? You’re making money, right? Ann Coulter doesn’t go boo-hooing over the reactions to her “books” because she’s laughing all the way to the bank.It’s time for you to man up and quit worrying about the reception your book has received. Cash the checks and quit whining.Me: Right. It’s a book blog about a book. A book I’m proud to have written. A book I think is very good (and quite a few folks agree with me so far) which has often generated some very bad — and I don’t mean critical — reviews.
But what an odd complaint. If not here, where? If not me, who? Moreover, I would guess that I let about 98% of the critical reviews and comments sail on by with little or no comment. Usually, this silence results in other boorish emailers complaining that I’m not responding enough. It seems I cannot win. So I’ll just keep doing the best I can, when I can.
Behold the Audicity of Hope! Seriously, this should be a children’s book. It’s like the Helen Keller story, except with physical handicaps replaced by a blinding sense of entitlement. And Miss Keller probably didn’t whine as much.

February 13, 2008 at 10:34 am
The thought of children reading that and thinking he might be onto something makes me shudder.
Bad, bad editors.
February 13, 2008 at 10:35 am
This is boring. I demand a nervous breakdown. Shuffling off into obscurity is not enough reward for the investment of reading even a paragraph of this chump’s drivel.
February 13, 2008 at 10:41 am
If not now, when? If not me, who? uh…I think jonah’s embarrassingly over his pay grade on cultural references he doesn’t understand. Another blow to judaism.
aimai
February 13, 2008 at 11:05 am
It’s exactly like the Helen Keller story except it ends at the part where she’s always grabbing food off other people’s plates.
February 13, 2008 at 11:18 am
I too think the work is inspiring and have recorded a PODCATS ABOUT IT!
February 13, 2008 at 11:26 am
I too think the work is inspiring and have recorded a PODCATS ABOUT IT!
We lubs teh podcats. Mrow.
‘nesh out.
February 13, 2008 at 11:56 am
“A book I think is very good (and quite a few folks agree with me so far)…”
With the book #6 on the NYT bestseller list, you’d think he’d get over the whining defensiveness of the Cheeto-stained wretch riding mom’s coattails, but he may have just enough self-awareness to realize that his shtick is amusing but transient, like a feces-flinging monkey’s.
February 13, 2008 at 1:07 pm
This is like a sandbox version of the sort of back-and-forth letters from author and reviewer that clutter the back pages of The New York Review of Books. Except those rise above the level of “Oh, yeah, well, my mom liked it!”
February 13, 2008 at 1:27 pm
Debatable.
February 13, 2008 at 2:06 pm
have recorded a PODCATS ABOUT IT!
Oh noes! Is the Invasion of the Kitteh-Snatchers! They’re here already! You’re next!
February 13, 2008 at 2:32 pm
“So I’ll just keep doing the best I can, when I can.”
that sounds a little achievement fascist to me.
February 13, 2008 at 5:46 pm
Moreover, I would guess that I let about 98% of the critical reviews and comments sail on by with little or no comment.
So, we’re only hearing about 2% of the criticism? Damn, no wonder he’s whining and sniveling. The other 98% must be really really bad.
February 13, 2008 at 6:00 pm
Kill the Cats
They’re dangerous freeloaders.
I’m more of a dog guy, but I like cats. Nonetheless, a cat massacre makes more sense than you might think. Not cougars or mountain lions or tigers on the loose but putty-tats: Sylvester the cat. Morris the cat. Garfield.
Cat defenders say that this is all bogus. We like kitties. This raises an outrageous double standard.
February 13, 2008 at 6:05 pm
See, I’ve always thought Bush was better on the issues. Admittedly, I despise his rhetoric.Compassionate conservatism is a crock. And I would like nothing better than to discover that the fringe Left is exactly right when they say it’s a con.
I hope George Bush is just saying “nice doggie” until he can find a rock.
February 13, 2008 at 7:19 pm
Dear Jonah,
1. What the fuck is Goucher College for Ladies?
2. Jonah, every douche in the world taught English in The Czech, it’s in the douche handbook.
3. Go try get a ph.d. before you utter another “intellectual” fucking word from your fat fuck mouth.
love,
Grandma Goldberg
February 13, 2008 at 9:41 pm
So I’ll just keep doing the best I can, when I can.
Jonah
{tears up}
You just
{turns away briefly}
keep on keepin’ on!
{wipes eyes with hankie}
You’ve been through so much! It’s just not fair!
{bawls inconsolably}
February 13, 2008 at 10:45 pm
All Charlie Tuna, no battle rap.
February 14, 2008 at 12:48 am
toona haz a flavr.
it tayst liek blud.
February 14, 2008 at 8:09 am
“If not here, where? If not me, who? ”
Nowhere? Nobody? Who forced you to start a blog all about your goddamn book?
February 14, 2008 at 2:16 pm
I realize that JG is in Effect and Will Take All Titles One at a Time, or All at Once but please consider this for a Golden Winger award when the time comes.
http://lefarkins.blogspot.com/2008/02/things-i-am-not-making-up.html
February 15, 2008 at 12:38 pm
Lee Siegel was on the Daily Show yesterday.
Shorter Lee: Blogofascism is the fascism of Liberal Fascism.