Like, what?
Via.
… I keep trying think of something to say about this, because the silence is so awkward. I don’t really have anything, but I’ve come up with:
1. Dear God, I accept that this is pretty much Chix With Dix. Following your son’s example on the cross, I will graciously accept that there is really no plausible alternative reading here, and that somehow Captain Ed’s change of URL is supposed to make Chix sprout, well, Dix. And that I share a planet with this shit. All I ask, God, in your mercy, is that you give me Edward Scissorhands hands so I can claw my fucking brains out. In your mercy.
2. God, I’m not trying to be funny with you.
3. Dude … WHAT?
…UPDATE: Oh thank Christ.
February 26, 2008 at 5:56 pm
This comic makes me very sad and scared and lonely.
February 26, 2008 at 6:15 pm
Could you also ask God if women have to grow dicks, could they maybe not be Cap’n Ed’s?
February 26, 2008 at 6:27 pm
“Freaky deakies need love, too.”
–Tracy Jordan, 30 Rock
February 26, 2008 at 9:58 pm
It’s explainable, but that doesn’t make it funny.
He references – and I use that loosely – the advertising campaign for Captain Morgan Rum in that third panel.
Trash culture begets trash culture, I guess. I always assumed date rapist fratboys drank the rum, and date rapist fratboys found conservative webcomics funny. Little did I know that pool was so small.
February 26, 2008 at 10:22 pm
Jim, you have explained nothing.
I weep.
February 26, 2008 at 10:43 pm
The clitoris?
I give up.
February 26, 2008 at 11:13 pm
Oh, thank Christ. Anything but CwD. It was all getting way too literal.
February 27, 2008 at 12:28 am
Muir’s brain does not works like ours. I believe that there must be serious cognitive defects that lead to the adoption of the conservative “lifestyle.” I have not seen many Day by Days, but they all seem to mimic the form of a comic without providing anything recognizable as humor, much as a sociopath mimics the emotional aspects of human behavior in an attempt to blend in.
Either that, or his comedy is working at some trans-dimensional level of meta-ironical-post-mirthfulness that we are just too dense to comprehend…
February 27, 2008 at 12:52 am
“…much as a sociopath mimics the emotional aspects of human behavior in an attempt to blend in.”
Jesus Christ, AAA, you would know. Your posts scare the fuck out of me, reminds me of an Anton Chigurh greeting card.
PS
Thank God I found my Chigurh joke.
February 27, 2008 at 1:03 am
Cap n’ Ed is a little prick?
What do I win?
February 27, 2008 at 2:49 am
Better. Its good to see you getting back into the swing of thing. It seems like you could go off on a long riff relating this to all the love Republicans have for the cock.
Are there any straight Republicans?
February 27, 2008 at 6:38 am
It might be the chair going “sproing”. Which would mean she farted and broke the chair? She is so fat she broke the chair? I got nothing.
February 27, 2008 at 6:47 am
He makes me think of some alien from a distant planet who’s read a couple of books about what comics are, but has never actually seen one.
February 27, 2008 at 7:27 am
Actually, your comment made me realize what is supposed to be represented here, although it’s still inane. At first I thought there was someone on the floor hiding behind the chair making a twitching sound, and she got up to check who it was (Captain Ed?). When she did so, a certain body part of the Captain’s went “sproing” (perhaps caused by the appearance of her scantily clad body,) causing her to salute his manliness by posing like Captain Morgan.
Now I can see that she was sitting on the chair reading, and she was the one involuntarily twitching and jumping up from the chair to pose like Captain Morgan. This involuntary movement was apparently caused by Captain Ed joining Malkin’s shreiking monkey site.
Clearly the second interpretation is more logical than the first, but I think the first is more humorous.
February 27, 2008 at 10:31 am
I am already on record, at Sadly, No!, for desperately guessing that it means she’s pregnant. The twitch is the fetus. The sproing is the chair. The little captain in all of us is the fetus. The ref to Cap’n Ed is a fawning shout-out.
Am I wrong, Dude?
February 27, 2008 at 11:16 am
He makes me think of some alien from a distant planet who’s read a couple of books about what comics are, but has never actually seen one – Craig
I’d say a computer, but even the Archie Joke Generating Laugh Unit 3000 is funnier than Chris Muir.
February 27, 2008 at 11:48 am
In situations like this, I ask myself, “what would Bill Hicks say about this?”
In fact, he did say something about this, but he was talking about Basic Instinct:
“Don’t get caught up in that fevered hype phoney fucking debate about that Piece-of-Shit movie. “Is it too sexist, and what about the movies, are they becoming too dddddddd.” You’re, you’re just confused, you don’t get, you’ve forgotten how to judge correctly. Take a deep breath huuh, look at it again. “Oh it’s a Piece-of-Shit!” Exactly, that’s all it is.”
Look, The Editors. Can I call you The? The. It’s a piece of shit. That’s what you’re looking at.
Everything’s gonna be alright.
February 27, 2008 at 2:47 pm
He makes me think of some alien from a distant planet who’s read a couple of books about what comics are, but has never actually seen one.
The trick to understanding this strip (and most of Muir’s strips and that miserable, god-forsaken heap of steaming ordure that is Mallard Fillmore) is to realize that these goofballs aren’t really trying to tell jokes. They’re telling anti-jokes and using our confusion as further “proof” that we are stupid.
They are telling “No soap, radio” jokes–the issue for me is whether they’re consciously aware of it or not. (I don’t think they are, but sometimes, I’m not sure….)
February 29, 2008 at 12:39 am
“Day By Day” is the “Nancy” of the 21st century.
February 29, 2008 at 1:47 am
The Editors is right–now that she’s on Malkin’s sight, she’s sprouted a dick. Why that’s a good thing is not explained, or explainable.
March 1, 2008 at 1:56 am
[...] Also, the 2006 elections? You got destroyed. You lost everything you could possibly lose, and it was totally embarrassing. This doesn’t actually have anything to do with what we were talking about, but it is really fucking funny. And it’s going to happen again this year, only worse, and for the forseeable future. Bigger conspiracy theories needed. SPROING! [...]