One-and-a-half million:

Oxfam warned yesterday that 1.5 million people could die needlessly in Burma as the first outbreaks of disease were reported in the wake of Cyclone Nargis, and many of the worst-hit areas went an eighth day without aid.

International agencies called on the country’s secretive military junta to allow immediate access to those stranded without food, clean water and medicines. Cholera, typhoid and malaria could take hold within days as lack of food and shelter weakened the resistance of survivors. More than 100,000 people are believed to have died in the 130mph winds and storm surges that hit the country last weekend.

“Supplies will run out unless more aid is allowed into the country,” said Christian Aid’s Burma expert, Ray Hasan. “Partners are telling us that there are outbreaks of disease already. There is no time to lose.” The UN World Food Programme said it had never seen such delays in dealing with a modern humanitarian crisis and described the official response as “unprecedented”.

This isn’t – or shouldn’t be – a partisan political issue. But there is an election going on, and someone is going to be President, and their judgment is going to matter. With that in mind:

After John McCain nailed down the Republican nomination in March, his campaign began wrestling with a sensitive personnel issue: who would manage this summer’s GOP convention in St. Paul, Minn.? The campaign recently tapped Doug Goodyear for the job, a veteran operative and Arizonan who was chosen for his “management experience and expertise,” according to McCain press secretary Jill Hazelbaker. But some allies worry that Goodyear’s selection could fuel perceptions that McCain—who has portrayed himself as a crusader against special interests—is surrounded by lobbyists. Goodyear is CEO of DCI Group, a consulting firm that earned $3 million last year lobbying for ExxonMobil, General Motors and other clients.

Potentially more problematic: the firm was paid $348,000 in 2002 to represent Burma’s military junta, which had been strongly condemned by the State Department for its human-rights record and remains in power today. Justice Department lobbying records show DCI pushed to “begin a dialogue of political reconciliation” with the regime. It also led a PR campaign to burnish the junta’s image, drafting releases praising Burma’s efforts to curb the drug trade and denouncing “falsehoods” by the Bush administration that the regime engaged in rape and other abuses. “It was our only foreign representation, it was for a short tenure, and it was six years ago,” Goodyear told NEWSWEEK, adding the junta’s record in the current cyclone crisis is “reprehensible.”

Mr. Goodyear has resigned. Which is good. For an overview of the Burmese government’s human rights record, see here.

We tend to come down hard on whores, and those who consort with whores, in public life – see Eliot Spitzer for an example of this. There are worse things to be. Yes, it is very seedy to sell what should be freely given. But we all gotta make a living. And if someone has some surplus money, and someone else has some surplus time, who are we to say what sorts of private arrangements they can or can’t make? And it’s not like you don’t laugh a little extra hard at your boss’s jokes – if that guy was as funny as you seem to think he is, he’d be watching him on Letterman every Friday night instead of having him sign your timecard over at the Southeastern Buttfuque Office Supply Company. (You really are a fucking embarrassment sometimes. Your parents agree.)  So the guy took some money to tell people that the Burmese regime was not as bad as it is.  Political campaigns – all of them – are full of this sort of person.  You hire paid liars because nobody with any talent for it will do it for free. Meh.

On the other hand, it’s not like this is an isolated incident.  In addition to his polyamorous coziness with the lobbyist community, especially our friends the telecos, McCain himself takes a very libertine attitude towards these sorts of quid pro quo – a sort of “you scratch my back, I’ll assrape the taxpayer” pragmatism which works so well in this ethically fluid era.

And if one of the participants in this little menage is less than fully informed in their consent, well, two out of three ain’t bad, you know? If you don’t get down like that then you probably should have said something when we were all arranging it, a few Novembers back. You knew his reputation. So he brought along a few professional “friends” and so you weren’t perhaps as central to his affections as some of his pillowtalk had led you to believe. That’s tough. Put on a Hank Williams record and he’ll tell you all about it. Live and learn.

The problem with whores and whorers (and, as the noted philosopher Ludacris has observed, there’s little real difference between the two) is not that they may have unwisely gone to bed with undesireable person X or Y. Let’s face it, for certain values of X and Y, we’ve all done that. The problem with whores is that they will get in bed with anybody, and anybody who gets in bed with them gets in bed with anybody else who has ever procured their services. And nobody in the overcrowded bed gives a shit about you, only what you can do for them.