There are a number of very good reasons why I don’t want to vote for John McCain. For example: he’s crazy. And in those areas where he isn’t actually crazy, he is willing to act crazy to appease the Crazy Bush Base. He is a very angry little man. And now, in his one pre-executive decision, he has managed to pick the craziest, stupidest, most unqualified, most embarrassing candidate since the Foley Administration … and whose pastor believes that terrorism is God’s judgment on the Jews, and that people who don’t love Bush are damned … and whose undeclared business was shut down by the state … and who compassionately cut state funding for pregnant teens, like her daughter … and is basically the biggest disaster since the Titanic crashed into the Hindenberg while I was drinking a New Coke and watching ‘Gigli’.
On the other hand, I just discovered that HE’S MY FRIEND!!! How can I possibly vote against my own dear friend?
In a related story, my thoroughly vetted VP Airwolf released this statement, through a spokescopter, responding to recent scurrilous allegations:
Thwacka-thwacka-thwacka-thwacka …
Jhweeesh – errrrr – SHWOOOOOSHHHHH!!
fshhhhhhhhhhhhh …
KAAAAAAAABBBBLLOOOOOOOOMMMMM!!!!!
Thwacka-thwacka-thwacka-thwacka, my friends.
That’s awesomeness you can believe in.
September 2, 2008 at 9:38 pm
potatoe
September 2, 2008 at 9:47 pm
That’s awesomeness you can believe in, my friends.
Fixed
September 2, 2008 at 10:45 pm
Thwacka-thwacka-thwacka-thwacka, my friends.
Now that brings images of McCain to mind I’d just as soon not think about.
September 2, 2008 at 11:12 pm
Can this election be over soon please?
September 2, 2008 at 11:36 pm
“and whose pastor believes that terrorism is God’s judgment on the Jews, ”
That wasn’t the pastor, you dope. That was Larry Brickner, delivering a guest sermon.
September 2, 2008 at 11:48 pm
“Thwacka-thwacka-thwacka-thwacka, my friends.”
So what you’re saying is the RNC delegates are relieved that they can now fap to Sarah Palin instead of Byron York, even if Pat Buchanen still wants to fap to Joe Scarborough.
September 3, 2008 at 2:16 am
I thought the Day By Day jonanism sound was “pocketa pocketa”
September 3, 2008 at 4:14 am
Airwolf!
September 3, 2008 at 7:47 am
I don’t want to be critical of Sarah Palin but why do none of her children have Christian names? They have names, of course, just not names that you might find in the Scriptures. Sarah herself has a Christian name from the Old Testament so I assume her parents were God-fearing. Why isn’t she?
September 3, 2008 at 10:49 am
Nich, you’re wrong about that. Every time she introduces her children, people say “Jesus Christ, you named you named your kids WHAT?”
Okay, that’s mean. I actually think those kids have pretty cool names, especially Trig. And getting shit in school builds character.
September 3, 2008 at 7:19 pm
Editors/Airwolf ‘08!!!
Thwacka-thwacka-thwacka-thwacka
September 4, 2008 at 1:05 pm
The question should be do you want intelligence or four more years of the same intellect running this nation.
Lets see my choice is John McCain or that smart black man Barack Obama?
McCain who does not know how to use a computer but is willing to learn if we elect him – I’ll just vote for that smart black man.
My Choices are: John McCain who says the economic downturn is psychological? – Na! I’ll vote for the smart black man.
McCain who says you are better off under George Bush? – Nope I’ll vote for the smart black man.
Mc Cain who wants to continue killing more people looking for weapons of mass destruction that do not exist? – Gee! I’ll vote for the smart black man.
McCain who believes that we should stay the course but is not willing to support the people he puts in harms way. – I’ll take a chance on the smart black man.
Should I vote for a man that does not know that 9-11 was caused by Osama Bin Laden not Sedam Hussein? – Easy! I’ll vote for the smart black man.
Vote for the man who does not know if the Sunnis or Sheits are our enemies? – No way I’ll vote for the smart black man.
Vote for the man who helped put our government on the China, Saudi Arabia credit card? – Not a chance I’ll vote for the smart black man.
Vote for the man with the worst temper in the Senate to have his finger on the nuclear button? – No way – I’ll vote for the smart black man.
September 28, 2008 at 6:26 pm
Don’t worry Sarah Palin will save the nation’s economy!
McCain said to the Wall Street Journal, in November 2005: “I’m going to be honest: I know a lot less about economics than I do about military and foreign policy issues. I still need to be educated.”
In December 2007, McCain similarly said: “The issue of economics is not something I’ve understood as well as I should.”
In December 2007 McCain again made a similar statement, while also saying that he’d like to appoint a vice presidential running mate who is “intimately familiar” with economics, and that is Sarah Palin? Is this the financial genius he was talking about?
The Chicago Tribune Interview 12/07: McCain said, “The issue of economics is something that I’ve really never understood as well as I should. I understand the basics, the fundamentals, the vision, all that kind of stuff,” he said. “But I would like to have someone I’m close to that really is a good strong economist. As long as Alan Greenspan is around I would certainly use him for advice and counsel…”I’ve never been involved in Wall Street, I’ve never been involved in the financial stuff, the financial workings of the country, so I’d like to have somebody intimately familiar with it,” he said of a potential vice presidential candidate, and that’s Sarah Palin?
GOD HELP US ALL!!!!!