In recognition of this momentous moment of crisis and uncertainty, I am officially suspending my blogging activities until I can figure out how to turn myself into a bank.
Anyone still blogging hates America.
September 24, 2008
September 24, 2008
In recognition of this momentous moment of crisis and uncertainty, I am officially suspending my blogging activities until I can figure out how to turn myself into a bank.
Anyone still blogging hates America.
September 24, 2008 at 5:41 pm
Pretty mavericky of you.
September 24, 2008 at 5:48 pm
I have a question about the bailout. How are they going to divvy up the money? Have they said how much money each company will get?
Will they play poker for it or something?
September 24, 2008 at 5:49 pm
i’m suspending all commenting until such time as i realize that this very thing i’m writing now is a comment. at which point i intend to join john mccain’s campaign in imploding.
September 24, 2008 at 6:15 pm
You know I’ve heard that statement before. Now, my friends, I’ll offer anybody here fifty dollars an hour if you’ll stop blogging for the whole season. So, ok, sign up! Ok, when you sign up, you sign up, and you’ll be not blogging for the whole season, the whole season, ok, not just one day. Because you can’t do it, my friend.
September 24, 2008 at 6:17 pm
I’m not going to debate you during this crisis, but my running mate, this bag of Sweet and Spicy Doritos will meet you Friday to debate your running mate, (I’ll assume a cat.)
September 24, 2008 at 6:21 pm
The President’s address on the crisis to the nation has been leaked…
My fellow citizens, events in Congress and Wall Street have now reached the final days of decision. For more than a decade, the United States and other nations have pursued patient and honorable efforts to deregulate the our financial system without risk. Our good faith has not been returned.
The Democrats have used oversight as a ploy to gain time and advantage. They have uniformly defied the Secretary of the Treasury’s resolutions demanding $700 billion in immediate cash. Over the years, our innovative investment bankers have been regulated by Democrats, electronically bugged, and systematically deceived. Peaceful efforts to increase tax exemptions for bankers have failed again and again — because we are not dealing with peaceful men.
Intelligence gathered by this and other governments leaves no doubt that the Congress continues to possess and conceal some of the most lethal boatloads of cash ever devised. This regime has already used regulations of mass oversight against Wall Street’s neighbors and against Wall Street’s people.
Lehman Brothers, Fannie Mae and other financial companies did nothing to deserve or invite this threat. But we will do everything to defeat it. Instead of drifting along toward tragedy, we will set a course toward financial safety. Before the day of accounting horror can come, before it is too late to cash out, this danger will be removed.
The United States of America has the sovereign authority to use taxpayer funds in assuring it’s bankers’ own financial security. That duty falls to me, as Commander-in-Chief, by the oath I have sworn, by the oath I will keep.
The United States, on behalf of other countries, will work to advance funds and string-free cash to the banking sector. The power and appeal of free money from the government is felt in every life and every land. And the greatest power of financial freedom is to overcome taking losses and paying taxes, and turn the creative gifts of financial men and women to the pursuits of subsidies and sales of credit default swap options for mortgage backed securities.
Good night, and may God continue to bless the banks of America.
September 24, 2008 at 7:20 pm
I am officially suspending my blogging activities
Why not? You’ve done it before.
September 24, 2008 at 8:40 pm
Unlike McCain, your 2nd string can carry on well enough without you.
September 24, 2008 at 8:47 pm
“Maverick” is quite a creative euphemism for, ‘doing stupid shit on a whim.’
Just the quality we need in our next president.
September 24, 2008 at 10:07 pm
I’m suspended on a leather swing and would prefer that this, uh, crisis go on for a couple more hours. Maybe even another day or so.
America comes first.
September 25, 2008 at 7:24 am
…until I can figure out how to turn myself into a bank.
Word to the wise: in this market you want to be a bank holding company. All the best banks are, these days!
September 25, 2008 at 7:29 am
…will meet you Friday to debate your running mate, I’ll assume a cat
You’ve lost already. While you’re busy assuming a cat, you will get an Airwolf.
PS: Gerald Curl FTW.
September 25, 2008 at 9:04 am
Every semester during finals week someone pulls the fire alarm just before an exam.
Just sayin’ . . .
September 25, 2008 at 9:07 am
Will they play poker for it or something?
Obama is a poker guy.
McCain is a craps guy.
So post Jan 20, it would depend on who won the election.
September 25, 2008 at 9:15 am
In trying times like these , my friends, it is important that we, oh my god, PANIiiiiIiiiiIiCC!!!!!!!!1!!1!!1!!!!
September 25, 2008 at 9:19 am
vachon Says:
September 24, 2008 at 10:07 pm
I’m suspended on a leather swing…
I’ll be right there for a, um, debriefing.
September 25, 2008 at 10:23 am
For a low low fee, I’ll be happy to explain how you can turn The Editors, LLC into a bank.
But you have to ask fast, this kind of offer comes along only once in a lifetime!
~
September 25, 2008 at 10:44 am
Do what I do. Just say, “Something suddenly came up.”
September 25, 2008 at 11:29 am
Now you write a couple posts about how your opponent cravenly refuses to quite blogging while you are bipartisan-saving-the-nation and gay-marrying-henry-paulson. (or maybe you should leave out that last part)
September 25, 2008 at 11:42 am
I’m suspending all commenting until The Editors refuse to comment on Brad Hanson. Because it would be beneath us all if they did.
September 25, 2008 at 9:03 pm
I am officially suspending my dried-leech-smoking activities until I can figure out how to turn myself into the police.