With all signs pointing to the ascendance of Hussein du Allah al-Hidden Mahdi von anti-Christ Superstar, you’d think the pray-for-armageddon set would be giddy with excitement at the impending return of Battle Action Jesus – equipped with Judgement Day JDAMs to shock-and-awe the coastal elites in the Passion of the Schadenfraude. As anyone familiar with scripture could tell you, it is not enough that I be saved, but I must also be able to watch you burn in hellfire for eternity (especially when I think that you think that you’re better than me). That’s called letting Jesus into your heart, and you should have thought of that.
Yet, oddly, the ressentiment-fueled rapturologists are panicked at the onset of the necessary evils that must accompany the End of Days denouement. Folks, it’s gotta get worse before it gets better. Or, if you will, it’s always Shariah-est before the Return of Jesus. That’s kind of the whole point.
Makes one question the sincerity of their beliefs. Not that I doubt the authenticity of the burning, spiteful desire to be on the right side of the Eternal I Told You So of Salvation (man is that gonna be sweet), but some recent actions do cause me to call some of my brethren’s faith into question.
For example, Ralp Genghis Maximus Peters worries that if Obama is elected, every Evil/Brown country will take over the United States at the same time and kill us all, everywhere, and the Arab terrorists from Iran and Venezuela will have won. Other losers: feminists and journalists (as if that’s a bad thing all of a sudden?). From the list of “winners” in the post-Obama inauguration era:
Al Qaeda. Pandering to his extreme base, Obama has projected an image of being soft on terror. Toss in his promise to abandon Iraq, and you can be sure that al Qaeda will pull out all the stops to kill as many Americans as possible – in Iraq, Afghanistan and, if they can, here at home – hoping that America will throw away the victories our troops bought with their blood.
It’s true. al-Qaeda had been deterred from attacking Americans by Bush’s projected imagery of git-r-dun toughness on terror – like the the Neon Beer Sign of Eärendil. Historians will note the near perfect record: everywhere other than in America on 9/11, in Afghanistan before and since, in Iraq since the invasion and in other locations abroad that don’t get Fox News’ projections of Tough Bush piped in.
But Obama’s pandering to the powerful pro-terrorist base in the Democratic Party (pretty much every Dem) has led him to promise to go easy on bin Laden as long as he stays in Pakistan (unlike McCain). This wavering will convince al-Qaeda to switch back to a policy of trying to kill Americans.
If McCain gets elected, on the other hand, there will be a creeping ambivalence poisoning the ranks of would-be terrorists: potential suicide bombers worrying that McCain might kill them if they try to kill themselves, and nobody wants to die – especially suicide bombers. Not to mention that with McCain’s stated intention to stay in Iraq, al-Qaeda will continue to choose to leave and stop attacking US troops, just as they’ve been leaving and abstaining over the past six years of Bush’s disemboldening refusal to budge. And this:
Israel. In the Middle East, Obama’s election would be read as the end of staunch US support for Israel. Backed by Syria and Iran, Hezbollah would provoke another, far-bloodier war with Israel. Lebanon would disintegrate.
To which I say: John Hagee’s supporting the wrong candidate!
October 20, 2008 at 9:49 am
There are diminishing marginal returns on made-up titles and names.
October 20, 2008 at 10:39 am
Makes one question the sincerity of their beliefs.
And the coherence. When your beliefs consist of “whatever I’m ordered to believe today”, they get kind of muddy.
October 20, 2008 at 1:28 pm
the Neon Beer Sign of Eärendil.
Marry me, The Editors.
October 20, 2008 at 1:28 pm
the Neon Beer Sign of Eärendil.
Marry me, curv3ball.
October 20, 2008 at 1:37 pm
…’cause, see, I totally knew who posted this, but wished to cruelly toy with curv3ball’s affections. Yeah, that’s it.
October 20, 2008 at 1:47 pm
I’m so…confused
(runs out of room with tears down cheeks)
October 20, 2008 at 1:55 pm
NOW LOOK WHAT YOU’VE DONE!!!
October 20, 2008 at 2:01 pm
There are diminishing marginal returns on made-up titles and names.
Tell that to Lehman Brothers…
October 20, 2008 at 2:55 pm
No, Guenther was confused. You see, usually the way these things work is: it’s Party A that touches Party B’s tra la la, then Party B touches Party A’s ding ding dong. If Party A touches Party B’s tra la la AND ding ding dong, without reciprocation, not to mention whether Party B actually has both tra la la and ding ding dong, well … things could get very ugly.
And confusing.
October 20, 2008 at 3:33 pm
So Colin Powell says “Obama, I am your father… and Republicans suck!!”
What’s next? Will the “Young African American Republicans For McCain/Palin”
endorse Obama on national television?
Surely the MSM is using a highly technical synapse frequency wave transmission technique to control minds per Satans orders. Watch. The LA ink craze will be replaced with full body skin coloration to make one appear more “Arab”. And then the terrorism will really begin.
October 20, 2008 at 9:01 pm
NOW LOOK WHAT YOU’VE DONE!!!
Aw, crap. This is awkward. In my defense–IS THAT BILL AYERS OVER THERE?!?
[Runs out door]
October 23, 2008 at 2:01 pm
NOW LOOK WHAT YOU’VE DONE!!!
Aw, crap. This is awkward. In my defense–IS THAT BILL AYERS OVER THERE?!?
[Runs out door]
I don’t see what the problem is. You’re all liberals, right? Like any real liberal could stand to be married to just one person. It’ll be big of you.