Arkansas state Sen. Kim Hendren, who is currently the only announced Republican candidate for U.S. Senator against Democratic incumbent Blanche Lincoln in 2010, has apologized for referring to Sen. Chuck Schumer (D-NY) as “that Jew,” at a county Republican meeting last week.
“I don’t use a teleprompter and occasionally I put my foot in my month,” Hendren told Arkansas blogger Jason Tolbert.
The “teleprompter” being, of course, a box of devil Jew magick that converts one’s thoughts to printed words, inserting the full names of various Jews as appropriate, and imperiling your Christian soul. Or, better: he had a teleprompter, but some Jews stole it. FINAL EDIT: they cunningly Jewed him out of it. A teleprompter would have cleared that up.
More:”At the meeting I was attempting to explain that unlike Sen. Schumer, I believe in traditional values, like we used to see on ‘The Andy Griffith Show,’” he explained. “I made the mistake of referring to Sen. Schumer as ‘that Jew’ and I should not have put it that way as this took away from what I was trying to say.”
My favorite thing about ‘The Andy Griffith Show’ was how easy it was to remember the names of all the Jewish characters. There was that one episode where a Jewish fella from New York gave Opie some jazz cigarettes to pose in Aunt Bee’s unmentionables, and the Jew TV executives who cancelled the show and replaced it with interracial oil rasslin’ and mouthy wimmin with hairy armpits – ‘Mayberry, RFD’, I believe that show was called. That’s about it.
Late Update: Hendren gave a further apology to the Associated Press. “When I referred to him as Jewish, it wasn’t because I don’t like Jewish people,” he said. He also added: “I shouldn’t have gotten into this Jewish business because it distracts from the issue.“
Wait: when did he start wholesaling diamonds?* This story is confusing.
* This is the exact moment my teleprompter broke.
May 15, 2009 at 10:58 am
The “teleprompter” being, of course, a box of devil Jew magick that converts one’s thoughts to printed words, inserting the full names of various Jews as appropriate, and imperiling your Christian soul.
Ever notice Obama’s affinity for teleprompters? Huh? Huh?
I think you know what I’m getting at here.
May 15, 2009 at 12:16 pm
Someone might want to let him know that The Andy Griffith Show was not a documentary. Really, I actually like the concept that “traditional values” are derived from old TV sitcoms. I’m more of an Addams Family gal myself, if we want to stick with the 60s.
May 15, 2009 at 12:54 pm
Give me the Beverly Hillbillies. Nothing says “traditional values” like hitting the (oil) lottery and moving up the social scale.
May 15, 2009 at 12:37 pm
Andy Taylor would never have said a mean or bigoted word about anyone. As for Barney, it’s hard to say. But Ernest T. Bass? Flat out anti-Semite.
May 15, 2009 at 12:47 pm
Slander.
May 15, 2009 at 12:47 pm
Next he’ll be telling us he ain’t got nothin’ agin immigrants, neither, on accounta how nice Juanita over at the diner always was.
Butasfor….FLOYddddddddddddd….the…….
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…………….BAHR-ber…well……who knows?……………………………………………
May 15, 2009 at 1:01 pm
Well I always thought Floyd was gay, even I think back then it was ‘understood’ somehow:
“ooooooh Andy….”
But maybe he’s on to something: certainly Barney Fife would have tortured anyone at the drop of a hat to try to get an arrest. So yes, most of the Bush administration was Barney Fife. And didn’t that guy call them ‘Mayberry Machiavellians’? I think our friend from Arkieville is just about right.
And Opie walkin around with no shoes was likely to get hookworm, for which reason all them southerners is stupid.
May 15, 2009 at 1:22 pm
“mouthy wimmin with hairy armpits”
A brilliant string of words, with added metatheses inside:
“hairy wimmin with mouthy armpits”
“mouthy armpits with hairy wimmin”
My day is now made like a rich man’s bed.
May 15, 2009 at 1:26 pm
I hope Hendren’s handlers Jewed him out for that remark.
Opie rules, Floyd Jews.
Now if we could just wrap this gays-as-pedophile slander mixed with anti-Jewish sentiment into some kind of lawncross burning with a Michael Steele effigy in a lynching diorama, I;d say our souls would rest comfortably in hell.
May 15, 2009 at 6:57 pm
What, no one remembers Christmas-hatin’, miserly department store owner Ben…Weaver? The Andy Griffith Show was PC before liberals invented PC.
May 15, 2009 at 9:17 pm
Screw the html. Let dah mewsik doo duh tawkin.
May 16, 2009 at 10:44 am
I think all of you have forgotten that Andy regularly referred to Barney, with love, as “that Jew” — in a traditionally American and valued way, yet.
Good times. Good times…
May 16, 2009 at 3:59 pm
[...] Needs more stuff about Jews. Work on [...]
May 16, 2009 at 9:28 pm
Originally, his name was Barney Feifel.
May 18, 2009 at 11:22 am
I think it is safe to say that, even in BF Arkansas, this may very well come back to haunt him. I also love how, after cleanly shooting himself through the foot, he then turns around, opens his mouth again, and blows the f***er off at the knee. Nice work Senator.