In his first major policy speech since being sworn in for a second term, Afghan president Hamid Karzai made a solemn pledge Wednesday to combat the rampant corruption of Afghan president Hamid Karzai. “Let me be clear: I will not rest until I bring an end to my graft and backroom deal-making,” said Karzai, later adding that he will personally head up an investigation into allegations that he authorized massive voter fraud in order to secure his own victory in August’s presidential election. “The blind eye that I continue to turn to drug trafficking, embezzlement, and human rights violations will no longer be tolerated, and I will do everything in my power to finally bring myself to justice.” Karzai also announced the appointment of several relatives to a new commission that will tackle the problem of nepotism within his administration.
This is no way to run an empire.
December 7, 2009 at 11:28 am
Maybe if we promised to get him a new fuzzy hat.
December 7, 2009 at 12:20 pm
“new fuzzy hat”
We’d have to find something more exotic than aborted lamb fetuses.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/south_asia/1956862.stm
December 7, 2009 at 7:35 pm
Is “fez” Arabic for fuzzy hat?
December 7, 2009 at 5:02 pm
From “The Onion” right?
.
December 7, 2009 at 5:49 pm
Oh, well if he’s personally looking into allegations of his own malfeasance, I feel better.
December 7, 2009 at 5:54 pm
“The New York Times reported May 18, 2009 that Zalmay Khalilzad “could assume a powerful, unelected position inside the Afghan government under a plan he is discussing with Hamid Karzai, the Afghan president, according to senior American and Afghan officials.” That this plan has been discussed with the State Department. Khalilzad had pursued the Presidency of Afghanistan but missed the May 8 filing deadline.[18]
The Associated Press quotes Zalmay Khalilzad as saying “I am not negotiating with President Karzai to become Afghanistan’s CEO”.[19]
Malalai Joya speaks to the issue of Khalilzad’s power, since 2001, in her book “A Woman Among Warlords”[20], recounting the key role Khalilzad played in the Unocal pipeline negotiations, in Bonn in the nomination of Karzai, and later in the orchestration of the first Loya Jirga, to which Karzai was allowed to select many delegates.”
wiki
December 7, 2009 at 6:29 pm
When do we start calling Karzai the “Batista of the Hindu Kush?”
December 7, 2009 at 8:23 pm
I think you just did.
December 7, 2009 at 8:36 pm
And what exactly do YOU know about running an empire? It ain’t easy, I tell ya.
December 8, 2009 at 8:11 am
Empirin’ is hard work.
December 8, 2009 at 8:01 am
Armchair imperialist?
December 9, 2009 at 6:59 am
I envision armed forces safe-sex-abroad videos opening to the infamous Dan tune:
December 9, 2009 at 8:26 am
I think the world pretty much moved beyond the reach of satire sometime in the Boosh years. Say, just about when Jon Stewart became the equivalent of Walter Cronkite. The ‘Onion’ now exists largely just to give us tomorrow’s news early.
December 9, 2009 at 11:29 am
The ebullience of 60s/70s drug humor, only funny because drugs were illegal, and happy because we believed they would be legalized within a decade.
[i]Never let them see you coming[/i] is the sharper’s motto. reagan was one helluva sharper. In 1974, Nixon impeached and Boomers making little babies of their own, the idea that a Hollywood hack would squarify ’80s America with drug czars and neo-domino theory Central American mini-Nams, was almost as crazy as a peanut farmer becoming president in ’76. The idea that 21st century America would look back on Ronald Reagan the way our parents had looked back on FDR was all the argument that nihilism would ever need.
Sure it’s easy to look back now and see that if only the Republicans had run Wayne Newton, Obama wouldn’t have stood a chance. But modern hindsight is 20/20 only if bounced through a fun hall’s mirrors.
(George Dubya voice): What’s this nigroh doin’ on mah stage?!?
December 10, 2009 at 8:00 am
I think it was the boomers having kids that brought us Raygun. If by 1946-1952 the oldest boomers were born, they would be reaching their 28-34 and themselves have kids at home. And getting the midlife crises. Starting their second marriages, getting into debt with their new houses, etc. Of course Cronkite rattling on about: ‘The three hundred and fifty first day of American captivity…’ surely helped the Reagan insurgency. That, and backroom deals with the Persians.
December 9, 2009 at 11:30 am
“Say, just about when Jon Stewart became the equivalent of Walter Cronkite.”
Wow. You are like, you know, pundit-y, dude. That was *awes*.
December 10, 2009 at 8:09 am
In other news:
Atrios makes a good point –
Dems Will Own All Of Health Care
I hope Dems in Congress take a moment or two to think about the politics of health care reform. Once it passes they will own all of it, not just the reforms. Republicans will turn every health insurance horror story in a story about how the Dems’ HCR is a tremendous awful horrible failure, whether or not it has anything to do with specific reforms enacted.
All of this is my subtle way of suggesting they’d better pass something that people like and that works, because otherwise every insurance company dick move will be their fault.
Note to self: I need new dick moves.