Obviously, nobody wants to watch a bunch of muscley men jump on top of each other in tight shiny pants and slap each other on the ass if it’s going to be interrupted by a bunch of gay shit.
January 30, 2010
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January 30, 2010
Obviously, nobody wants to watch a bunch of muscley men jump on top of each other in tight shiny pants and slap each other on the ass if it’s going to be interrupted by a bunch of gay shit.
January 30, 2010 at 5:08 pm
Right on brotha. Let’s keep the homoerotic shit the hell away from football.
January 30, 2010 at 5:47 pm
Especially that part where the guy sticks his hands under the other guy’s ass and has a big brown ovoid ball slammed into his paws.
January 30, 2010 at 6:59 pm
I’m actually really heartened by how many of the comments on a football site were “hey, the ad was funny, they should have aired it, no big deal.”
January 30, 2010 at 9:11 pm
Only men know what men like. It’s not gay if I want to get all sweaty and grab and push to fight for my dominance. Is it gay to become so flaming mad at a man that I have to hold him down and mount and pound him? Of course not! You are a total homo for making me like to spend time with my all male crew of 44 with 15 other men to teach us what to do in between showering and dressing up in totally masculine costumes with many color variations and special commemorative patterns of how the other men would did each other in the 60s, 70s, and 90s.
How can you say that my Soccer Kit collection is gay? Just because Fenbernace introduced a Peach Soccer alt away Jersey this season and I bought it for 170 Euros makes you gay!
Look. I don’t need any girls hearing the secrets I tell my “team mates.” They don’t understand how to put the jock strap on right or where the best place to put the tinactin is and they’re not even strong enough to hold me down while they do it.
footballshirtculture.com/
January 30, 2010 at 10:01 pm
January 30, 2010 at 10:19 pm
This post was just a flimsy excuse to subject us to that Brady video again. Surely there’s nothing gay about a sport whose toughest player ever was named “Dick Butkus.”
“…when he wanted to drill you, he really wanted to drill you — and probably would wanna drill you when the game was over.”
January 30, 2010 at 10:52 pm
“Surely there’s nothing gay about a sport whose toughest player ever was named “Dick Butkus.””
[!RimShot!]
[!DoubleEntendreWordScore!]
January 31, 2010 at 9:11 am
“When god created The Bears he created human beings that looked like bears.”
Jerry is doing it on purpose.
“He never took a shower after the game. He just went and found his locker and lied down and licked himself.”
That… I have no idea what that’s about.
January 31, 2010 at 10:10 am
Dick Butkus was one of a number of players who, back in the day before million-dollar salaries, worked in the fledgling porn industry during the off season. Others included Bart Starr, Lynn Swann, Willie Wood, Paul Hornung, Lance Rentzel, Mel Blount, Bob Griese, Dick LeBeau, Les Shy, …
January 31, 2010 at 5:11 pm
I gather these are *real* names. Mercy.
January 31, 2010 at 5:11 pm
Paul Hornung. The mind reels…
February 1, 2010 at 7:38 am
Lynn Swann was known for his acrobatic, indeed ‘ballet-esque’ graceful moves on the ‘receiving end’. He later danced with Twyla Tharp. And he GREW UP with the name ‘Lynn’. Need I say more? Oh yeah, and he’s a Republican, ahem….
February 2, 2010 at 4:42 pm
And the name Swann is just a little too close to “Schwanz,” don’t you think?
January 30, 2010 at 10:27 pm
My google-fu has failed me. I am trying to find a post in the archives here- something about the sixties being a long time ago, knowing this by a device called a “calendar”, talking to nutty people on the bus about the weather to keep them calm, etc. Any help will be rewarded with these shiny new internets.
January 31, 2010 at 9:35 am
I long thought that the only way football would be interesting would be if it were played naked.
January 31, 2010 at 9:38 am
Make that “I have long thought…”. Jesus.
January 31, 2010 at 5:09 pm
(ahem)15 seconds and 63 yards to go, peorgie the telepathic ventriloquist opted to throw one last desperate Hail Mary thought.
January 31, 2010 at 12:08 pm
Football is pretty gay.
Professional wrestling and MMA are gayer, though.
January 31, 2010 at 5:01 pm
…as ghostwrit by Joshua Goldman
January 31, 2010 at 5:17 pm
Oh yeah. Supposed to be about football.
January 31, 2010 at 8:02 pm
MMA is gayer then Liberace multiplied by Paul Lynde.
February 1, 2010 at 10:07 am
Those fake traffic signs behind the guys’ heads are so tarty, especially No entre and Caution: This equipment starts and stops automatically.
I love it.