This exchange from a Chris Matthews interview with the Family Research Council’s Peter Sprigg makes me want to suck a dick on principle:
Matthews: Do you think we should outlaw gay behavior? Sprigg: Well, I think certainly..
Matthews: I’m just asking, should we outlaw gay behavior?
Sprigg: I think the Supreme Court decision in Lawrence v. Texas which overturned the sodomy laws in this country was wrongly decided. I think there would be a place in this country for criminal sanctions against homosexual behavior.
Matthews: So we should outlaw gay behavior?
Sprigg: YES!
One thing that makes tolerable the fact that there are so many Americans this backwards and hateful is this: their world is slowly, yet inevitably, crumbling. Every day more and more people in this country, and the world over, come closer to discarding silly biases and false divisions. The moral cowards are losing their grip on our collective genitalia. And they know it. And it causes them intense anxiety. It wakes them up in the middle of the night and…well, I’m sure the nocturnal reactions vary.
PS: Your counterrevolution is over Mr. Sprigg. Condolences. The bigots lost. The bigots will always lose. Do you hear me Mr. Sprigg?
February 3, 2010 at 9:45 am
“… makes me want to suck a dick on principle.”
You may be on to something quite important here.
The enduring mystery about all this anti-gay shit is why anybody cares so deeply about what other people do with their pee-pees. I’ve not read the whole Bible, because it is quite boring and badly needs an editor, but I’m reasonable familiar with what Jesus is supposed to have said, and it’s worth noting that in His 30 years on Earth, He never once mentioned The Gay. It was all compassion this and the poor that and the usual LIEberal pablum. Maybe He was just about to say “but what I REALLY want to tell you ,” but then Judas sold him out. Maybe the Greek or Hebrew word for “blessed” is really close to the word for “icky”, and similarly “the meek” and “fagg0rts”, and the whole thing’s just a kooky misunderstanding. For all I know – or, indeed, care – that could be exactly what happened. But I am sightly dubious.
But maybe you really are upset about sex stuff in the Bible. Why not condemn far more common practices, such as masturbation or adultery or divorce? Aren’t more souls imperiled by these widespread deviancies than by practices which will only ever appeal to only a rather small portion of humanity? And yet it’s constant, endless, compulsive, monomaniacal. THE GAY! THE GAY! THE GAY!!! The only other people who think about The Gay so frequently and with anything approaching the same level of passion are, well, The Gay. Hmmm.
I’ve said nothing original so far. But now consider: what if this is all intentional? What if these poor things want to be gay, they really, really, really do, but they don’t want to do it in a world where most people are not. So they have embarked on a deliberate plan to drive everyone on Earth so insane with their constant shreiking about the deadly consequences of what some people are doing with their private lives that we are willing to try anything to shut them up. “Now, look. Everybody has stuck a dick in their ears so they don’t have to listen to you. Will you shut up now? Everybody has hidden themselves in the restrooms of gay bars to avoid dealing with you? Will you shut up now? Everybody has gotten gay married married
February 3, 2010 at 9:50 am
… in hopes that maybe that will make you stop bothering us. Do you suppose you might kindly consider shutting the fuck up NOW?” At which point they jump right in.
Makes more sense than any other explanation I’ve ever heard.
February 3, 2010 at 2:56 pm
“Makes more sense than any other explanation I’ve ever heard.”
O thou hypocrite! First cast out the long dong in your own ears and then shalt thou hear clearly to remove the teenie weenie from thy brother’s… ear.
February 3, 2010 at 10:00 am
There will always be such people in Amerka, and they will always want to bother the rest of us. There is little that can be done about this, I’m afraid. But, why the fuck do these cable news clowns feel the need to parade them in front of like circus freaks?
February 3, 2010 at 11:31 am
“I’m sure the nocturnal reactions vary.”
YMMV according to EPA (Evangelical Prudish Assholes) emission standards.
February 3, 2010 at 11:32 am
“The enduring mystery about all this anti-gay shit is why anybody cares so deeply about what other people do with their pee-pees.’
Majority of people are, it seems, constituionally incapable of minding their own business. Given that, folks will legislate nose-picking if allowed.
February 3, 2010 at 11:34 am
“Everybody has stuck a dick in their ears ”
I envision an Arrow-thru-my-Head headband thingie with the cock’n'balls.
February 3, 2010 at 1:03 pm
Didn’t Steve Martin do that?
February 3, 2010 at 2:53 pm
Yeah, but his arrow wasn’t circumcised, and there were no feathers on the balls. Muy not kosher, and what kind of a principle is that to suck dicks on, hmmmmmmmm??!?
February 3, 2010 at 3:24 pm
It is so cool I morphingly oscillate between a birdfoot/bullhead winged chimera with raspberry drool, and Zoot Suit Yokum, mah he-row.
I conclude from this that prayers addressed to Ken are sometimes answered.
February 4, 2010 at 7:36 am
I find it interesting that the big Verbots against “sodomy” and “abortion” are in Church Fathers, not actually per se the New Testament. But, here’s the good part: in the Didache (the teaching, what is to be learnt by new catechumens) it says in translation ‘sodomy’, but in the Greek it is:
“paidophthoreia” — i.e. mis’handling’ of boys/youths. With which, pace NAMBLA, I think we would all agree, and likewise for little girls before their nubile coming of age.
Nothing about, say, adult lovers, such as the disciple whom Jesus ‘loved’.
And also, for that matter ‘fornication’, is really “pornemateia” — that is, resort to prostitutes. Not just idly screwing around with basically nice girls you pick up at the grocery store. Or in the ‘eccleseum’.
February 4, 2010 at 4:03 pm
[...] Shared Homogenic. [...]
February 4, 2010 at 5:26 pm
Just make sure Mr. Sprigg doesn’t take our absolutely fabulous post-conterrevolution rug on the way out the door.
All jokes aside, one of my great joys in life is seeing bigots increasingly marginalized.
February 9, 2010 at 3:49 pm
It’s a good thing that heterosexuals never engage in any acts that could be considered “gay behavior” like oral or anal sex. At least, that is what I assume, as I only read Christian-approved materials (excepting, obviously, this website).