Ever since the incredible news broke that John Tesh and Oprah Winfrey were totally in love and kissing and everything, I – along with every civic-minded American – have been reading the TeshBlog even more intently than usual, waiting for John to tell us, his devoted Teshoholics, how we can apply this important development to continue our spiritual growth, or raising a healthy teen, or re-organizing our collection of darling glass unicorns, or frightening small children with our ghastly B-movie monster head, or whatever.  For those who missed it, here’s what I’m talking about:

Singer John Tesh , former “Entertainment Tonight” anchor, not only has confirmed that he and talk-show goddess Oprah Winfrey , 56, were a romantic item decades ago but that the relationship was pretty deep, Associated Press reports. But the reason they split may have tongues wagging. According to excerpts from Kitty Kelley ’s book “Oprah: A Biography,” which were published in the New York Daily News, Tesh, 57, and Winfrey lived together in Nashville in 1974 while he was a news anchor at the city’s NBC affiliate and Winfrey was the city’s first female anchor at the CBS affiliate. But the romance fell apart when Tesh succumbed to the pressure of being in an interracial relationship. Kelley quotes an “ex-girlfriend of Tesh’s” saying he told her one night he looked down and saw his white body next to Winfrey’s black body and “couldn’t take it anymore.”

Sorry.  I just couldn’t take it anymore.

Where were we?  Oh yeah – silence on TeshBlog.  Now, I sources close to something which is exactly as close to me have wondered if this is because John Tesh doesn’t really write his own blog posts.  But this is impossible, for two reasons: 1. all posts are signed “John”, so duh-hoy, and 2. I happen to know for a fact that he types them all himself on his personal laptop in his studio, except when his migraines start acting up, in which case Uncle Fester puts a soothing blue light bulb in his mouth and John dictates to The Creature From The Black Lagoon.  (Despite having webbed hands, TCFTBL can type 200 words pr minute.  Mavis Beacon, baby.)   So, if it really is John, why hasn’t he said anything?  Is the memory too painful for him?  Would Connie Sellecca get jealous?  Or is he channeling his powerful emotions into his art?  Will he tell his story in a song? … or a special concert in Red Square? … or – oh God, please let it be – a CONCEPT ALBUM!?!?!

We live in heady times, my friends.  Big heady times.

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